Blogging for Books-The Dawn of Christmas

I have started a new adventure, ya know if my spare time! HA! J I am now reading books and doing reviews J The first book I received to review was called The Dawn of Christmas by Cindy Woodsmall, it is an Amish fiction novels, which are my top favorites to read and it was Christmas themed!  Sure doesn’t get much better than that!! J

The Dawn of Christmas tells the story of two people, both who have guarded hearts for very different reasons. Sadie and Levi are very different, yet very much the same. Will Sadie let her guard down and allow Levi in and can Levi be trusted to guard her heart, no matter the cost? Set in the heart of Amish country this story pulls you in from the very first page and leaves you wanting more at the end. It brings in the magic of Christmas, the wonderful simplicity of the Amish and leaves you thirsty for more books by this author!  Definitely a must read for the Holiday Season and really any time of year!!! Once again Cindy Woodsmall knocked this one out of the ball park!

Preview Chapter One!! http://waterbrookmultnomah.com/files/2013/06/SneakPeek_DawnofChristmas.pdf

For more information on The Dawn of Christmas check out this link, http://waterbrookmultnomah.com/catalog.php?work=226490

 You can check out more books by Cindy Woodsmall at her website  http://www.cindywoodsmall.com/ and more about her by reading her author bio here: http://waterbrookmultnomah.com/author-spotlight.php?authorid=72213

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book for free from Blogging forBooks.com. I was not asked to write a positive review, only for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Oct 15, 2013- Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

***I have a lot of catching up to do, but kinda like my laundry, I can never quite get to the bottom, so I am going to jump back in and then add back dated posts as often as I can until I am caught up!!**

You’re not forgotten, I know some day’s it may seem like that, some day’s I am so wrapped up in everyday life, doing laundry, cleaning house, helping navigate home work, breaking up fights, cooking dinner, working, juggling ballet, soccer and girl scouts, having play dates.  Some day’s it may seem like our lives’ moved on and we never stop and reflect on what they would be like if things had been different. But I have never forgotten, and some day’s I look at your sisters and I wonder where you would have fit in, what would you have looked like, how would you have acted, would you have had curly blonde hair or stick straight, because I know hands down, it would have been blonde, would you love to read or play dolls or would you be more of a rough and tumble, in the dirt kinda girl, because we know you were a little girl. What would your favorite color be and would you love to snuggle. Losing you before we ever got to know you, and hold you and see you, it is so easy for you to get lost in the everyday, and although people all around me may have forgotten, I won’t, I never have. Just the other day I read my journal entries where we found out about you, I was so excited, it was my best birthday present ever! And I was so confident that everything was going to be just fine because my HCG level’s were threw the roof, “DeAnna were sure it is at least twins, be prepared for your next sonogram”, I remember looking at your dad and giving him the thumbs up sign and picking up Carleigh and swinging her around, We were outside in the front yard of our little house. It was a picture perfect moment, we laughed and cried and then we ran inside to put Carleigh in her “Big Sister” shirt so that we could send out a text message hinting of our good news.  That is where I like to stop remembering….. Because that portrays a happy ending, but our story goes on and you were taken from us to soon, and then just when we could breathe again after losing you in November, we suffered another loss in April, a boy or a girl we are unsure but still we were devastated and defeated, we hung our heads and cried and Instead of bringing home babies, we brought home little tiny gold rings that sit in a memory box in the top of my closet.  Today the world celebrates mom’s who have lost their babies without ever getting to see or hear them take their first breaths, tonight at 7 p.m. I will join the world in lighting a candle to remember you, my sweet babies who went home before we could hear you or see you, I will light a candle for all the mom’s who carried their babies full term only to have to say good bye, or the mom’s whose babies came a week or two too soon, and their hearts are filled with the “if only’s”. Tonight I will light a candle and I will remember that SOME DAY all of those mama’s will get to love and hold and rock their babies again, and I will smile because what a sweet day in Heaven those reunions will be.  Won’t you please join me tonight by lighting a candle to remember all of those who have experienced the heartbreak of miscarriage, still birth and infant loss?

Last Day of School Year 2012/2013

You both had a great school year! I can't believe how much you both have changed this year!!!!

Caylee and Carleigh says old edition

This is an old draft I found waiting to be published!! oops! :)

  Upon getting Caylee ready for the night I notice she has a brown skid mark in her undies ( I am not sure of the politically correct way to say that blog world sorry!) Before I could say anything Caylee looks down at her undies and sighs very heavily and says dead serious " Dad pooped in my undies again" I was completely caught off guard but before I died laughing I managed "WHAT?!?!" "yup, he took off my undies, put them on to poop in them, and then put me back in them...geeesh" with another very heavy sigh....... my sides hurt from laughing so hard at this one!

Carleigh was watching a Christmas movie that had Mistletoe in it, all of a sudden she disappears into her bedroom and reappears with her own homemade mistletoe on a red piece or yarn. "Here daddy hang this up for me" Mama come stand under it so he can kiss you" so we obliged only to hear EWWWWWWWWWWW and for her to run off, Next thing we know Caylee runs over to her daddy with her piece of red yarn "here Daddy hang up my MistleTALL, stand under my mistleTall mommy!!!

We took the girls to the Parade of Lights and as Santa came by I hear Carleigh exclaim "It's Santa, It's Santa, oh my gosh I am going to faint!!!

Caylee ate dinner at her meme's one night and when I asked her what  she had she said "fagaccini" I said you mean fettuccini and she said that's what I said mom "the best fagaccini ever"

We have a few people in our families that are pregant and randomly one day while driving down the road the following conversation took place with Carleigh "Mom how long after you get married is it before you go into labor?" (I was internally thinking, (A) this conversation is going to someplace I am not ready to go yet with my seven year old and (B) I am really glad she thinks you have to be married to get pregnant! LOL!!!) Me: "Well it just depends, daddy and I were married three years before you got in my tummy......"well geesh mommy it sure didn't take long for a STORK to bring a baby and put it in a person "who shall remain nameless's" tummy And here is the moment where I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief that my seven year old still believes a Stork brings babies to your tummy!!! Oh Carleigh, hold on to that nieveness for a while longer!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

4 years young

Dear my little spunky Caylee

Today you turned 4 years old, How that is even remotely possible I just don't know! In some ways I feel like you have been my baby forever. Adding you to our family was seamless, you were a perfect fit. And as you have grown with each passing year, I see how God has made you the perfect end to our little family. You aren't in a hurry to grow up, you never tell me your a big girl, you are prefectly fine with still being my baby, you still love to climb into your dad and my lap and be rocked, you have a passion for your binky that would rival any newborn, you don't feel the need to to things before you need too. You recently learned how to dress yourself, you were so excited when you ran  to me and showed me, and I was proud of you for trying! I know I have to let you grow up, and I want you to, at your own pace. You are bigger than most just turned four year olds, you wear a size 6x or 7 and a size 13 shoe. You make us laugh mulitple times a day and life is never dull with you around! A few things you are doing right now. You have learned many new things in Pre-K, including some of your letters, how to draw your shapes, you have a new found passion for puzzles and are really good at doing the, you love open play time in the gym and going outside. You still struggle at least three days a week with being dropped off at pre-k, you cry and don't want me to leave but Mrs. Bates and Mrs. Pacini say you are fine seconds after I leave. This has been by far my biggest challange. I wanted to pull you out of preschool but they assured me that doing that would make next year harder. My heart breaks every morning and I have shed more than a few tears on my drive to work over it, everyday when Meme picks you up and asks how your day is you tell her it was GRRREEAT, then when she asks if you cried when I dropped you off you say No Meme I not cry! You are such a stinker!  To celebrate your 4th birthday we went to "Carlos" pizza and bowling and decorated with Jake and the Neverland Pirates!!! Caylee each day you bring us so much laughter and joy :) I can't wait to see all the changes that come with you being a four year old!!!

Love you to the moon and back,
Mommy

A blog with no blogger

I have been absent for awhile, conflicted about where to take this little ol' blog of mine! I love the concept of blogging, I love the legacy it will leave for my girls some day, but I don't necessarily like the pressure I feel to write blogs that are not going to step on people's toes. I am a working mom, there are times when I feel like stay at home mom's just don't get those pressures, it is different then what they are going through but I don't ever want someone to feel like I am judging them or that I am minimizing there job as a stay at home mom, two different people two different journey's neither one better than the other, or harder than the other. But both hard in very different ways, I use to be a stay at home mom, and I have been a part time working mom and now I am a full time working mom, who knows what the future holds! LOL!! and then there is the pressure not to step on toes by discussing certain taboo topics, which we all know I love to talk about! LOL! I have family that do not "get" blogging, maybe they just don't understand it, it would seem you either like the blog world or you don't. Some view blog writing as a need for attention, I don't need attention, I get plenty of it, probably more than I would like! LOL! BUT I do love writing and I am not a very private person so writing on a blog is fun for me, especially if I can make someone laugh, or smile or feel better about their hairy girl chin, or there monster acting children! I have the philosphy of if you don't like what I am writing, don't read it, you don't have to understand me or agree with me :) I am here to entertain you with my stories of my made for a reality tv show life (without the camera's!! ). So I guess this post is a disclaimer, if you come around and read something that you don't like, don't get defensive, it probably wasn't written about you! but if you want to leave another viewpoint in the comments I would love the feedback! I want to embrace this blog, I want to use it as a sounding board for the book I am hoping to write someday soon and I want that written legacy for my kids!! So if you are here from my facebook page, sign on board as a follower as I will probably not be posting all my links on facebook anymore, I am going to just blog out here to the bloggy world, maybe pick up a few readers along the way maybe not, maybe I will be writitng to the dead space of the internet world and creating only an online journal of sorts for my kids! I am totally okay with that!!!  So tata for now! Hope your evening is filled with a few giggles!! I shall leave you with a picture of my giggling girls, ya know since it has been awhile!!! I have to get back and post Caylee's bday blog too, thank goodness for the back date feature!

Happy Valetines Day from our giggling girls!!!

From our house to yours we hope your day is filled with love and laughter!!



Cookies decorated by our little bakers in the making





Our House may look like cupid puked in it! :)



Vday shaped Chicken and Crescent rolls

 


Carleigh's "Princess" Valentine's Day box! Definitely from my girlie girl!

  

Caylee's "Bucky the Pirate ship" Vday box, seriously this child cracks me up!



Big 7 year old

If you have known me long, then you know that my kids are my little (well not so little anymore) miracles. No really, I am not just another mom spouting off about the miracle of life that grew in her womb. My kids are medical miracles. They were conceived purely by medical technology and only because God chose it to happen. They were conceived when all the odds were against us and only because we pushed onward even though the journey wasn't so pleasant. 7 years ago, I held the most prefect baby in my arms for the first time. Oh she had imperfections but she was whole and she was ALIVE and she was absolutely precious! And I was so glad we hadn't given up hope! It is very easy to forget, in our everyday life, that our kids are only here because God ordained it so, they aren't here because we forgot birth control one drunken night, or because we sat down and looked at our five year plan and decided it was time. They aren't here because our religious choice prevents us from using any kind of protection. They are here because of a doctor who wouldn't give up on us, and because God decided that I was the perfect person to be Carleigh (and Caylee's mama) and that people is so humbling!!!! But anyway I got off on a tangent! Back to my little miracle turning 7!!! 7 people that is crazy!!! Crazy because I am only 18 and there is just no way I could be the parent to SEVEN year old!!!!!! What the heck!!! But 7, 7 years as the mama to this crazy, cute, spunky, full of sass, dramatic, little diva who knocks my socks off at least once a day with the witty things she says!!! I remember when I prayed so hard that I would be able to carry her in my belly for 7 weeks, (because that is when our Dr. said the risk for miscarriage decreases) and then I prayed so hard for the 17 week sonogram  (I was so thankful that my doctor didn't make us wait until 20 weeks),that this little person I was growing would be healthy and indeed she was and we got to meet HER via sonogram and she was prefect  and then at 30 weeks, I started having complications so the prayers turned into please let me carry her to 37 weeks Lord, let her lungs develop fully by then. Alas we didnt' make it to the 37 week mark, we made it 35 weeks and 6 days and Carleigh made her entrance into the world, It would be fun if I told you she weighed 7lbs 7 ounces and was born at 7:07, LOL!! BUT I can't even thought that would but fun way to round out my story, she was 5 tiny pounds of amazing though, and she scored awesome on her APGAR test and never had to go NICU even though the doctor said she would, and she was amazing, and for the last 7 years she has made being a mommy the very best (alas not always easy) 7 years of my life (all 18 years of it!! wink wink!!)

Oh My "Big 7 year old" Carleigh,

That's what you tell me a million times a day "mom I am big 7 year old now, I can do it myself" One day at being 7 and you think you have it all figured out. Your independence is coming out in full force, I find myself fearing this, mostly because you want to dress yourself and you can't match clothes yet ....boy the discussions we have had about this already! And you want to do your own hair, which consists of slicking it down wet and parting it straight down the middle, a poster child for the 70's. Carleigh you and I and fashion, boy we have a lot to learn, because if I fail at anything in life it is definitely in the fashion department!! BUT I have managed to dress you and your sister pretty cute until now, so hang with me a little longer and I promise to hand the fashion department and you and my checkbook over to your auntie Dawn as soon as you get a little bit bigger!! Until then, I am sorry but you can't slick your hair 70's style....Someday you will thank me for this!! I can't believe how different you are from last year to this year, you are turning into a big girl and I am just not ready for it yet. You are doing amazing in school, you excel at reading which makes me a happy mama and you are awesome at math, which is so great and I am so happy about because I have always struggled with math! It would seem you take after your dad with that one! You have a big heart, and you want everyone to be your friend, you never want to leave anyone out and although you have a bit of a bossy tendency you always mean well. You get notes sent home from school often saying you have helped another student by sharing or just helping them understand something they don't. I look at you and I see so much of myself, and I just pray that life and people continue to treat you with kindness and I hope Carleigh, that when they don't, that you will still choose to have a kind heart, to give people the benefit of the doubt and a million and one chances, because that is such a rare quality, to always see the good in people like we do honey, that doesn't happen to everyone, it is a gift, one that will get your heart broken more than once, but also one that has rewards that go far deeper than anyone can see. So don't let anyone steal that from you. You are so much more than I could have ever dreamed for in a daughter, and my dreams reached all the way to the sky, so continue to soar sweet girl!!  Your dad and I love you so much!

Love,

Mommy (AKA Your Mother, which is how you are so kindly referring to me these days)