Ten things my parents DID NOT warn me about when I was becoming one!

10.That I would tear up, clap, and wrap a box full of presents, over a bowel movement,  ( a child's not my own, well maybe my own after the delivery!!)
9. That it would be years before I would be able to start and finish a new novel without having to reread the same chapters over and over again maybe only progressing  a page or two at each attempt because A. I fell asleep, B. the baby cried, puked, pooped, was hungry or maybe was doing all of these things at one time, or C. I fell asleep 
8.  That even after my kids started sleeping through the night I would never be able too again because they may be cold, warm, or stolen making me get up to check at least once or that  I would need to pee and get my own drink.... and so sleepless nights continue :)
7. That I would need to develop A.D.D. to keep up with my children and husband.....
6. Wait what was I doing again????
5. That I would develop an insane protective instinct and I would feel really ugly feelings toward anyone who attempts to criticize my children, they may be spirited and busy but by golly they are mine and you better not say one negative word about them, I definitely have a bad case of mama bear syndrome!
4. That I would one day sound just like them!!! ( maybe they did warn me of this and I just didn't hear them...hmmm seems familiar!)
3. That our sex life would be forever changed(can I say sex on my blog?? just being real here people!)....or wait did I ever have one of those?? I have seem to forgotten...
2. That my idea of a fun night out would include sending my kids to my sisters, donning my jammy pants and cotton t-shirt, re-reading those chapters of my novel and falling asleep by ten......

and the number one thing my parents forgot to warn me about is.................

1. That I would develop the language skills of a 2 year old, the attitude of a 5 year old and the mental capacity of man in order to cope  embrace the joys of being a working mama!!!!